Faith is Freedom
Faith (according to Wikipedia):
To commit
oneself to act based on sufficient evidence to warrant
belief, but without absolute proof.
Mere belief
on the basis of evidence
is not faith.
To have faith
involves an act of will.
Today I spent some time
talking with a very dear friend regarding some changes
developing in her life. As I listened to her story, I
reflected on how much is unknown in the unfolding of
our lives. As humans, we are most comfortable with some
degree of predictability in our everyday. When that
sense of order is challenged, we can sometimes feel
like we are in the midst of a great ocean without sight
of the shore. What should I do? Where
am I headed? And how will I know when I get
there?!, we wonder.
I am definitely a black sheep in my family... yet
really in the best possible way. My relatives often
wonder at the way I choose to live my life. I have made
the conscious choice to sacrifice certain securities
for a those uncertain. While many of the conditions of
my life have fluctuated considerably over the years,
the one security that matters most to me (while it may
be briefly forgotten from time to time) is never truly
threatened. It resides deep within my heart. It is
FAITH. Faith in the Brilliance that guides my life. It
is the "SH NE" that "i" am surrounded by.
Recent events have actually challenged the faith that
is my trusted foundation. Given the recent evolution in
my most intimate relationship (with a man whom I love
dearly), Brilliance has taught me a very valuable
lesson. I am realizing that,
all too often, I have prematurely assigned my faith
inappropriately. Upon reflection, I see that
I have placed my faith in a condition (such as: a
particular job, relationship, or source of
inspiration)... leading me to be repeatedly baffled
when I outgrow it. At other times, I have placed my
faith in those people close to me, sometimes
experiencing confusion (or even resentment) when their
desires no longer align with mine.
This became obvious in recent days as I felt a nagging
anxiousness... wondering if a particular condition that
I have invested my faith in will serve me in the end.
Placing my faith in this uncertain outcome, I felt
insecure and afraid. How could faith feel so fickle?!
Today it became clear... to place attachment to
something or someone outside of me is an illusion of
control masquerading as faith.
When I look around at the Great Unknown of my life, I
can sometimes feel a great sense of overwhelm. At those
times, I find myself looking for something (or someone)
to bring me a sense of security, safety, and a sense of
control over my destiny. Yet, I know better. Born a
black sheep, I know to trust the one thing that is
certain...
Therefore,
I am choosing to actively place faith in the
Unknown. Yes... by definition faith
dares me to place my trust in the one thing that I
truly believe always and in all ways will lead me to my
greatest good: paradoxically, that which is far outside
the scope of my understanding. Now THAT I believe in.
You see, for me, faith defies reason. And it is with an
irrational certainty that I find the greatest sense of
Peace in my heart and mind. Call me crazy...
call me naive...
call me what you will. Meanwhile, I call upon the Love
that I believe in above all else.
Faith is Freedom. It is true liberation to
know that you are secure in every way that matters in
the end. And so I choose to dip inside for a Freedom
that is attached to no-thing and no-one. I will do my
best to love others with more Freedom... without need
to hold on to any condition, person, relationship, or
outcome. I will move towards what moves me with a heart
faithful in its trajectory.
There is only one thing that I commit to holding
onto.... the Loving Hand that guides me gently along
this joyful path of self-discovery.